Amber's Backstory

In loving memory of

Amber-Lee Moroney

26.06.2020

I often joked that Amber-Lee was one of the most well planned babies. We as parents (Katie and David) wanted to build our careers, explore some of the world, live in a lovely house, get married and wait until after I was 30 to have children so that they would have the best start we could provide them with.

When we found out I was pregnant quite quickly we were so grateful as we knew many people who struggled or sadly experienced miscarriages so we were well aware of the risks. Apart from a few months of morning sickness and navigating pregnancy through the pandemic, pregnancy was luckily easy. I felt great and couldn’t wait to meet the little girl I had always dreamed of at our home water birth we had planned.

At 33+5 days pregnant (the day after my 31st birthday) I woke up at about 3am and realised I was bleeding very heavily. By 3.30am I was in the labour triage room but it was unclear what was happening. It was agreed that David was allowed to come and be with me as the staff could see how scared I was. At around 5.30am Amber’s heart rate dropped massively and I was rushed for an emergency C-section under general anaesthetic. Amber was born at 5.50am on 26th June 2020 and David was allowed to see her briefly. She was then taken to NICU. David spent time updating our families that Amber was born but was poorly.

After 5 agonising hours we were finally able to go and meet our little girl together in NICU. David was able to go to her incubator but because of recovery I was unable to move from the trolley bed. Staff kept asking her name and we chose Amber-Lee because her hair was golden and Lee is a name we have passed down on the female side of our family. Such a special name for our golden girl. She was perfect in every way and not as small as I thought she would be at that gestation.

Neonatal staff then gathered and took their face masks off to talk to us. They broke the devastating news that I had experienced a severe Placenta Abruption and that Amber had no brain function due to losing oxygen when the placenta failed. She would have no chance of survival. It had taken so long for us to see her because of all the tests they had been doing and also seeking expertise from other regional teams. Sadly, we both knew when the masks came off that they were going to tell us awful news.

Even with Covid-19 rules being so strict during June 2020, we were allowed to have as many family members come to meet Amber at NICU. We were able to have cuddles with her and build memories that day which would need to last us all a life time. After family had left, David and I requested a blessing/ naming ceremony to take place. Amber was given a gorgeous white dress and shoes someone had made and donated to the hospital.

After this we had time alone as a family of three and cuddled her saying our final goodbyes where she passed away in our arms. We are so grateful that Amber held on as long as she did to allow us to meet her when she was alive.

We stayed in a bereavement suite for a couple of days and took more pictures as a family. With Amber ‘sleeping’ by our side we began to make plans no parents should have to do for their baby. We were given beautiful memory boxes of things Amber had worn and touched which we treasure. We still sleep with her blanket between us.

Amber now has a little rainbow brother called Alex. His first journey after being born was to meet his big sister Amber at her grave. We have planted a memorial tree in our village for her and walk there every day to talk with her. We now know her as our ‘Baby Genie’ as any good thing which has happened since her birth we attribute to her sending us a sign she is with us.

Forever missing our golden girl.

Mummy and Daddy xxx